On December 16th, April and I celebrated 20 years of marriage. I wouldn’t call it a huge celebration. We swapped cards, love pats and the occasional we’re getting old joke! Click this link to get a picture of our life.
Twenty years ago we got married out in the middle of nowhere (Grays Chapel, NC) and it was less than 10 degrees. Many of the gamblers in attendance on that blessed day had the over/under of how long the marriage would last at 7 years, and if I recall there was huge amounts being bet on the under!
There is no real trick to being married this long but I have come up with a few words of sage advice that I often share with the young engaged couples. If you asked April, she may come up with an entirely different list, but this is my list.
When you read this, I think it would be fun to use the voice from the 60 minutes curmudgeon, Andy Rooney. I think it will be fun if we started it this way. “Do you ever wonder how Cam and April made it to 20 years? I do, so I asked him what were the secrets and this is what he shared.”
You need to love your in-laws. I have great in-laws. Even though sometimes when we get together, it resembles the Manson Family reunion; (the Brawl at the Beach, Hillsville, Easter, Christmas and Thanksgiving) they are a wonderful band of crazies. If you don’t get along with the “outlaws”, every holiday will be miserable. Holidays will be miserable because you are either with the in-laws or not with the in-laws. I much prefer to be with the in-laws.
I respect my past relationships. This is not about “pining for lost loves” but it is more about learning how to be a better man from the mistakes I made in other relationships. And realizing how God had a plan for me. Every date and every relationship was truly just a step closer to April. God works in mysterious ways. You have to believe that when we were both born that God saw the road map in how he would bring us together!
Bury it and bury the shovel. I got this line from the TV show Coach. Most marriage experts will talk about sharing and communicating. I will tell you that it takes 5 positive affirmations to make up for one negative comment. If you truly love someone then just keep your mouth shut and work it out internally. Whatever the issue is or was will go away with time. Bury it and bury the shovel should be in wedding vows.
Enjoy food. When all else fails, April and I can always drop a bunch of money on a great meal and all will be right with the world. And it doesn’t have to be an expensive meal. It can be garlic knots at the Brick, breakfast at the café, Hot Krispy Kremes or just Chick Fil A. We also work hard to try and have our family eat meals together. Often they are hurried but there is power around a quick prayer, dinner and a bunch of messy dishes.
Be a great parent. She is a great momma. April was raised to be a mom and not a wife and that is OK with me. She is a much better mother than I am a father or a husband and that creates so much glue to our family!
You must love the kids. So many parents’ lives revolve around their kids lives, and we are not far off of that. But for us, it is more of being focused on the entire family and not just the kids. We never miss an opportunity to tell and show our kids that we love them. They never go to bed feeling un-loved.
Do talk about life and career plans. We are probably a little geeky because we have planned out so much. Having discussions about when we wanted to have kids to when we wanted to change jobs to now planning about what to do after the kids go to college and when we retire; they all go together. We have been able to share each other’s dreams.
Share in each other’s universe from time to time. It would be easy since I work and April has stayed home that we just have all of the planets circling me and my work life. But one of the things that we have done (I admit that often I go kicking and screaming) is that we focus on her universe too. So not only does she have to go to receptions and parties that deal with my job but we do dinner, parties and socials with her circle of friends. The great thing about the sharing is that we now both have bigger, brighter and broader circles than we could have ever imagined.
Share your Faith. I can’t imagine having a spouse that didn’t believe nor had a different faith. I sometimes wish we were even more passionate about sharing our faith with each other but we are both passionate individually. Throughout the 20 years, we have had a few faith experiences that gave a boost to our marriage. But mostly it has just been a strong constant in our marriage and something that we both enjoy sharing with our children.
You must laugh. Our entire marriage has been about laughter. Often it was sitting on the couch watching TV. From Cheers to How I Met Your Mother, we have laughed. Often car rides and trips are punctuated by a gut busting, tear streaming, and a lose your breath kind of laughter.
From the outside, our 20 years probably seem a little boring. We have driven mini vans and station wagons. Weekends are typically yard work, house cleaning and naps. Vacations are mostly family trips with the in-laws. Life is a series of early mornings, car pools, ball games, laundry, board meetings, committee meetings, teacher meetings, laundry, Sunday school, spaghetti, falling asleep in the chair at 8pm, laundry…..Ground Hog Day over and over!
20 years ago I never dreamed it would be this good. And like every night for the past 20 plus years, I will fall asleep thanking God for bringing this woman into my life. The big celebration of 20 years may even be a quiet sharing of a glass of wine…..and then I will fall asleep in the chair!
December 16, 2009
December 2, 2009
Ramblings while Stuck in the Airport
I feel kind of like the Yugoslavian character Tom Hanks portrayed in the movie Terminal. I have been stuck in the Charlotte airport for the past 5 hours. The plane is in the hanger and they say it will be fixed any time now, mean while it is raining outside like it would if I had a tee time at Augusta National. 3 cups of Starbucks and as many trips to the "lav" and the day is pretty much lost. Today I guess that is just my luck.
I should have known it was going to be crazy this week. Notre Dame fires its Coach (the echoes are asleep), Tiger goes all John Edwards, our President pledges to send troops and then bring them home and the mom on Family Ties goes Lesbo - just like that. The world is upside down.
The funny thing about this flight today is after I boarded I had the unusual fortune of this gorgeous woman sitting beside me. She was wonderfully chatty and I was thinking this is going to be a pleasant two hours. Then the horror, "Would everybody please exit the aircraft!!!"
"NO, What about my seat beside Lauren the super model?"
"Sorry Mr. Corder. When we re-board you will either be beside Sam the refridgerator repair man, Evelyn with the crying baby, Tony with 8,000 piercings or Willie the shower curtain ring salesman."
It could be worse, I could miss my dinner meeting at a great Chicago Italian Restaurant. Oh, I forgot.....I am missing that!
If its not one thing its another. Up is down and down is up. First I am sitting beside Lauren and now Willie. It just goes to show you........Hey, my plane is fixed. Hooray!
I should have known it was going to be crazy this week. Notre Dame fires its Coach (the echoes are asleep), Tiger goes all John Edwards, our President pledges to send troops and then bring them home and the mom on Family Ties goes Lesbo - just like that. The world is upside down.
The funny thing about this flight today is after I boarded I had the unusual fortune of this gorgeous woman sitting beside me. She was wonderfully chatty and I was thinking this is going to be a pleasant two hours. Then the horror, "Would everybody please exit the aircraft!!!"
"NO, What about my seat beside Lauren the super model?"
"Sorry Mr. Corder. When we re-board you will either be beside Sam the refridgerator repair man, Evelyn with the crying baby, Tony with 8,000 piercings or Willie the shower curtain ring salesman."
It could be worse, I could miss my dinner meeting at a great Chicago Italian Restaurant. Oh, I forgot.....I am missing that!
If its not one thing its another. Up is down and down is up. First I am sitting beside Lauren and now Willie. It just goes to show you........Hey, my plane is fixed. Hooray!
November 29, 2009
The Turkey Trot
Brooks at 12 is getting taller, Ryanne at 15 is getting faster and April at (43 but don't tell her I told) is getting sweeter!
November 11, 2009
TEAM
My staff, I mean my team, probably hates that I reflect often about how we are a team. I guess for the non-sports staff, that doesn’t resonate. But everything about a true team resonates within me. I get goose bumps reading or watching about great championship teams and how they came together as one, well-oiled machine..... “Team.”
A great teammate has a willingness to lose themselves in the group for the good of the group. That is a cool definition but John Wooden, the great UCLA basketball coach, changed the word willingness to eagerness. He said that willingness sounded more like, “I will if I have to” where eagerness denotes a change of attitude to that you would be happy to sacrifice.
I like that, “Happy to sacrifice for the team.” I am eager to do whatever it takes to help you be successful. I am not just willing to help you because I have to, but I am eager because I want to and I cherish the opportunity.
On this Veterans Day, I lift up the grandest ideals of our military in how they mold super large groups of people into teams. Pride in our country creates a type of patriotism in our military that often moves me to that misty eyed mess of a man!
If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honored, all the parts are glad. Now all of you together are Christ’s body and each one of you is a separate and necessary part of it. (1st Corinthians 12:26-27)
Great teams and organizations know that all jobs are important and that no one is more important than the team. Michael Jordan is credited with saying, “There is no “I” in team but there is in “Win.” My comment to him after his Hall of Fame speech is, “Mike, the game ain’t over yet buddy and you don’t want to be standing alone at the end!”
A great teammate has a willingness to lose themselves in the group for the good of the group. That is a cool definition but John Wooden, the great UCLA basketball coach, changed the word willingness to eagerness. He said that willingness sounded more like, “I will if I have to” where eagerness denotes a change of attitude to that you would be happy to sacrifice.
I like that, “Happy to sacrifice for the team.” I am eager to do whatever it takes to help you be successful. I am not just willing to help you because I have to, but I am eager because I want to and I cherish the opportunity.
On this Veterans Day, I lift up the grandest ideals of our military in how they mold super large groups of people into teams. Pride in our country creates a type of patriotism in our military that often moves me to that misty eyed mess of a man!
If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honored, all the parts are glad. Now all of you together are Christ’s body and each one of you is a separate and necessary part of it. (1st Corinthians 12:26-27)
Great teams and organizations know that all jobs are important and that no one is more important than the team. Michael Jordan is credited with saying, “There is no “I” in team but there is in “Win.” My comment to him after his Hall of Fame speech is, “Mike, the game ain’t over yet buddy and you don’t want to be standing alone at the end!”
Today as you work, don’t think of yourself more highly than anybody else. We don’t want to see you fake humility, but to be genuine and eager to give up yourself for the good of others. Ask God to help you better contribute your talents so that the team can collectively do more than they ever dreamed.
November 8, 2009
To the Women in Our Lives
I read this last week. It was written by Leonard Pitts from the Miami Herald. It really expresses how we men feel about ALL women.
I am your brother, your father, your husband and your son. I've seen you in church with big hats on, giving children the evil eye. And at the jail on visiting day, shoring up that wayward man. And at the bus stop in the rain on your way to work. And at the dining table with pen and paper, working miracles of money. When I was a baby, you nursed me, when we were children, I chased you through the house; when we were dating, I missed half the movie, stealing sugar from you.
I saw you born; I took you to your prom; I glowed with pride when you went off to school. I have married you and buried you. I love your smile. A million times, you took my breath away.
You are the rock and salvation of our people, the faith that remains when all hope is gone. So if it's about the need to be beautiful, maybe it's time somebody told you:
You already are. You always were.
I am your brother, your father, your husband and your son. I've seen you in church with big hats on, giving children the evil eye. And at the jail on visiting day, shoring up that wayward man. And at the bus stop in the rain on your way to work. And at the dining table with pen and paper, working miracles of money. When I was a baby, you nursed me, when we were children, I chased you through the house; when we were dating, I missed half the movie, stealing sugar from you.
I saw you born; I took you to your prom; I glowed with pride when you went off to school. I have married you and buried you. I love your smile. A million times, you took my breath away.
You are the rock and salvation of our people, the faith that remains when all hope is gone. So if it's about the need to be beautiful, maybe it's time somebody told you:
You already are. You always were.
October 21, 2009
It Takes Skill
Skill is knowing what to do and having the ability to execute. Last week in my pick-up basketball game I threw a long alley-oop pass that swished. When one of the young guys told me how lucky I was, I just winked and replied, “all skill baby.” However, skill is more than knowledge and execution. A skillful person usually has a sense of timing.
I admire the skill of an artist, a surgeon, a song writer, a carpenter and a great athlete. I even have to acknowledge the skill of my kids to do great homework, my mother on her ability to remember every detail of my flawed childhood, and the skill of cooking that Ms Pat shares at the Y!
I am looking for an executive right now and I am looking for skill and will. I know that people with a great resume may just look good on paper. I also know that a person that interviews well just may be a great talker. I am looking for the entire package. I want the leader that is striving to be better tomorrow than he or she is today. I want a leader that can inspire others around them to greatness. I want a servant leader that has proficiency in the job and knows how to create success.
Do you see any truly competent workers? They will serve kings rather than ordinary people (Proverbs 22:29)
Many of my best candidates are great young leaders. I hope they understand how achieving great things takes experience and hard work. We all need to spend time in prayer asking God to show us our talents. We are on earth for a purpose and God has a plan for us.
We often aspire to be something that is measured in the eyes of our neighbors not in the eyes of our Lord. But what if we use our skill and our will to serve in whatever job role we lead? How would that be measured? The bible clearly states that those who serve others will be rewarded in heaven. In fact, the best leaders display a servant’s attitude.
Commit yourself today to developing and using the talents and gifts blessed from God. Ask God to show you the areas of service where you can use those talents. Work hard to develop those skills. Ask for humility that regardless of the world’s hierarchy that you would have a servant’s heart!
I admire the skill of an artist, a surgeon, a song writer, a carpenter and a great athlete. I even have to acknowledge the skill of my kids to do great homework, my mother on her ability to remember every detail of my flawed childhood, and the skill of cooking that Ms Pat shares at the Y!
I am looking for an executive right now and I am looking for skill and will. I know that people with a great resume may just look good on paper. I also know that a person that interviews well just may be a great talker. I am looking for the entire package. I want the leader that is striving to be better tomorrow than he or she is today. I want a leader that can inspire others around them to greatness. I want a servant leader that has proficiency in the job and knows how to create success.
Do you see any truly competent workers? They will serve kings rather than ordinary people (Proverbs 22:29)
Many of my best candidates are great young leaders. I hope they understand how achieving great things takes experience and hard work. We all need to spend time in prayer asking God to show us our talents. We are on earth for a purpose and God has a plan for us.
We often aspire to be something that is measured in the eyes of our neighbors not in the eyes of our Lord. But what if we use our skill and our will to serve in whatever job role we lead? How would that be measured? The bible clearly states that those who serve others will be rewarded in heaven. In fact, the best leaders display a servant’s attitude.
Commit yourself today to developing and using the talents and gifts blessed from God. Ask God to show you the areas of service where you can use those talents. Work hard to develop those skills. Ask for humility that regardless of the world’s hierarchy that you would have a servant’s heart!
October 17, 2009
So Cal Saturday (Repost)
Let me take you back to 1973. I was 9 years old and I had just spent the fall watching the Notre Dame football high light show on Sunday mornings before I went to church. I can still hear the late Lindsay Nelson’s voice say, “And now to further action.”
It was a Saturday afternoon in the Spring of 1973. My father had taken me and several of my friends to swim at the Greensboro Central YMCA. As we were leaving, the TV in the lobby was playing the UCLA vs. Notre Dame basketball game. My dad said, “we might want to stop and watch the end of this game. Notre Dame just might upset UCLA.” The UCLA Bruins had won 88 straight basketball games. And this my friends, was how my sports marriage to Notre Dame sports was born during the last ten minutes of that game. Screaming and cheering wildly at the TV in the lobby, my father could only chuckle or note to passersby, “Do these kids not have parents?”
When Notre Dame won that afternoon, I must have practiced throwing the ball in the air like John Shumate 10000 times. I wanted to die my socks Green and Yellow. I asked for Green carnations for my lapel for Sunday Church. I quietly aspired for my nick name to be Digger.Like a smoldering volcano, my love for all things ND lay dormant for many years.
There was no request for conversion to Catholicism. No, special requests for the pope. And I promise you there were many things to go to confession over but to this day they stay locked in the vault.I suffered under the Gerry Faust years. I anguished when they ran off Digger and I cheered for a few years the acquisition of Lou Holtz. Lou Holtz came about in my college days and my roommates thought it would be funny to burn all the ND memorabilia off my door. That day stays in the vault.
I became a true ND fan. Pulling for basketball as well as football. In the advent of the internet even looking at baseball, hockey, women’s basketball, etc. Could I name my first born Muffet? Then the movie Rudy came out and I felt in some way that the script was for me. The music, the tradition, the culture, the aura of all things Notre Dame. Hard to believe that the small town southern Baptist bred wished he was born red headed with the last name of O’Shannon or something.
Today I am a 44 year old man with one hobby; Notre Dame. I don’t ask for much but please let me see my football games every Saturday and the occasional basketball game.
As I reflect, I almost broke off the engagement to my wife, for during the national championship year of 1988, she made me go to dinner with her parents [promising to tape the USC vs. ND game.] Later that evening as we returned for the evening my future brother in law met me at the door screaming the results of the game. “I am sorry April, but the wedding is over! Oh, and I have to kill your brother Joe.”
We play Southern Cal on today. I hope we keep it under 45 points. It is usually not pretty but you have to love them during the tough times. Love hopes all things and endures all things. Love never fails.
Go Irish!
It was a Saturday afternoon in the Spring of 1973. My father had taken me and several of my friends to swim at the Greensboro Central YMCA. As we were leaving, the TV in the lobby was playing the UCLA vs. Notre Dame basketball game. My dad said, “we might want to stop and watch the end of this game. Notre Dame just might upset UCLA.” The UCLA Bruins had won 88 straight basketball games. And this my friends, was how my sports marriage to Notre Dame sports was born during the last ten minutes of that game. Screaming and cheering wildly at the TV in the lobby, my father could only chuckle or note to passersby, “Do these kids not have parents?”
When Notre Dame won that afternoon, I must have practiced throwing the ball in the air like John Shumate 10000 times. I wanted to die my socks Green and Yellow. I asked for Green carnations for my lapel for Sunday Church. I quietly aspired for my nick name to be Digger.Like a smoldering volcano, my love for all things ND lay dormant for many years.
There was no request for conversion to Catholicism. No, special requests for the pope. And I promise you there were many things to go to confession over but to this day they stay locked in the vault.I suffered under the Gerry Faust years. I anguished when they ran off Digger and I cheered for a few years the acquisition of Lou Holtz. Lou Holtz came about in my college days and my roommates thought it would be funny to burn all the ND memorabilia off my door. That day stays in the vault.
I became a true ND fan. Pulling for basketball as well as football. In the advent of the internet even looking at baseball, hockey, women’s basketball, etc. Could I name my first born Muffet? Then the movie Rudy came out and I felt in some way that the script was for me. The music, the tradition, the culture, the aura of all things Notre Dame. Hard to believe that the small town southern Baptist bred wished he was born red headed with the last name of O’Shannon or something.
Today I am a 44 year old man with one hobby; Notre Dame. I don’t ask for much but please let me see my football games every Saturday and the occasional basketball game.
As I reflect, I almost broke off the engagement to my wife, for during the national championship year of 1988, she made me go to dinner with her parents [promising to tape the USC vs. ND game.] Later that evening as we returned for the evening my future brother in law met me at the door screaming the results of the game. “I am sorry April, but the wedding is over! Oh, and I have to kill your brother Joe.”
We play Southern Cal on today. I hope we keep it under 45 points. It is usually not pretty but you have to love them during the tough times. Love hopes all things and endures all things. Love never fails.
Go Irish!
September 26, 2009
September 9, 2009
That Parkway Feeling
I spent Labor Day weekend on the Blue Ridge Parkway.
It is amazing watching the sun rise up slowly over Buffalo Mountain. Buffalo Mountain in Virginia got its name because it looks like the hump on a buffalo. Young sons would go off hunting with instructions from their mothers that if they can’t see Buffalo Mountain, they have gone too far.
It is amazing watching the sun rise up slowly over Buffalo Mountain. Buffalo Mountain in Virginia got its name because it looks like the hump on a buffalo. Young sons would go off hunting with instructions from their mothers that if they can’t see Buffalo Mountain, they have gone too far.
There seems to be a 50 mile stretch of the parkway where you get several views of the Buffalo.
Saturday, I rode my bike on the parkway. The scenery is so spectacular that you don’t mind the hills. It is hard not to feel close to God when you see the sights and sounds from the mountains. I think it is funny how we often feel closest to God when we are in the mountains or at the beach. Spectacular vistas, wonderful aromas and a certain amount of peace in being away from the hectic every day grind of our life. This allows for us to be drawn in to the quiet that brings us closer to God.
Why can’t we find that quiet in our daily lives? I imagine that we have too many obstacles back home. The grind of our daily lives and the pulls of home and work are too much to overcome. Someday soon, when you are taking kids to school and hustling to work, you need to ask yourself:
“ How are you going to find that parkway feeling?”
“ How are you going to find that parkway feeling?”
August 26, 2009
Conditioning
Brooks is going to play football for the first time. He is a big guy and is athletic so he should be good. But he has never had a coach really get on him. The first time a coach yells at him, maybe even grabs a little face mask, Brooks may want to quit. He is sensitive like his mother. I am worried that he has never been through the physical nature of football training. I keep encouraging him to start working out now, but his efforts have been half-hearted.
He and I played golf the other day, and we both were playing awful. You know how it is, some days you just can’t seem to hit anything where you want it. He wanted to quit. I kept encouraging him to fight through it; to be positive; to work hard at correcting mistakes. “Don’t just swing harder. Think through what you need to do.” But he would have nothing of it. He checked out mentally.
Consider the mental toughness required to make a 6 foot putt with a championship on the line, to complete a run or race in a personal record time, to make a difficult personnel decision, to give a closing argument, to perform a delicate surgery or to drive cross country by yourself! Each of these examples requires different conditioning. To be successful you have to practice the physical act and the mental and emotional act.
Success takes physical, mental and spiritual conditioning. Diet, exercise and drills can only take us so far. I have worked with so many talented people but they didn’t know how to take care of themselves and condition themselves with habits that lead to success. They had all of the innate skills to be a solid leader, but they would get distracted by…..well just call it immaturity.
Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is much more important, for it promises reward in both this life and the next. 1 Timothy 4:8
Commit yourself to staying fit physically, mentally and spiritually. You should desire to get in the best condition of your life, to use your time wisely and to have the desire to reach your goals. Spirit, Mind and Body - the Y way!!!!
Consider the mental toughness required to make a 6 foot putt with a championship on the line, to complete a run or race in a personal record time, to make a difficult personnel decision, to give a closing argument, to perform a delicate surgery or to drive cross country by yourself! Each of these examples requires different conditioning. To be successful you have to practice the physical act and the mental and emotional act.
Success takes physical, mental and spiritual conditioning. Diet, exercise and drills can only take us so far. I have worked with so many talented people but they didn’t know how to take care of themselves and condition themselves with habits that lead to success. They had all of the innate skills to be a solid leader, but they would get distracted by…..well just call it immaturity.
Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is much more important, for it promises reward in both this life and the next. 1 Timothy 4:8
Commit yourself to staying fit physically, mentally and spiritually. You should desire to get in the best condition of your life, to use your time wisely and to have the desire to reach your goals. Spirit, Mind and Body - the Y way!!!!
July 22, 2009
Brawl at the Beach
This is one of my favorite old posts. Updated from the summer of 2007.
It will not be long before the school bells start ringing again and it signals the end of another hectic summer. The summer of 2009 will be highlighted just like every summer for the past 15 summers; It is the annual Johnson family (my in-laws) beach trip.
Let me describe the week for you. 5 families, 18 people, and 1 house. More numerical trivia defines the week as 1 kitchen, 4 bathrooms, 4 in-laws, and 1 TV. There is another TV in brother in-law Brian’s bedroom but he retires to that room at 6pm every night so that TV was off limits. 10 adults and 8 children, a few of the adults could be classified as children but that is another story. There are 7 females and 11 males. Now refer back to that 1 TV thing and factor in only one remote.
Not that the average temperature on the beach is usually in excess of 100 degrees and that our A/C does all it can to cool the house below 75 has anything to do with it, but the week is always HOT! I used to print family tee shirts called The Brawl at the Beach, but my wife said that slogan painted a bad picture of our family and she wanted something more positive. I liked to call it The Brawl at the Beach because every summer for the last fifteen years this beach trip has been accentuated by an argument between spouses, a parent and child, or siblings. Every year, like clock work, someone was fighting by Wednesday.
You could call my family’s car the Vegas car because the 5 hour drive to the beach is spent speculating and placing odds on whom would be fighting first and what they would be fighting about. Oh yea, did I share that there are four in laws on this trip, and I am one of them? Well I am preparing to spend a week at the beach with the in-laws or better put, as THE IN-LAW. And this week is the best week of the year for me and my wife and kids.
I think what attracted me most to my wife was her family. My family communicates best over the phone and now by email. This family likes to hang out. That is “hang out with each other!” My family struggles to be civil to each other yet this family’s heartbeat is getting on each other’s nerves. It seems that they would rather argue together than be happy alone. I think there is a bible verse that says that in Proverbs! My family last took a beach trip or any vacation for that matter in 1973 and that was a true brawl at the beach.
But anyway this in-law revelry is so appealing to me that I am enthralled by the week like they have me in some brain washed hypnotic state. In a nutshell the beach trip is encompassed by husband-wife spats, bratty kids (except mine), smart-alec comments (that is me), hurt feelings, little relaxation, high stress, last nerves being trampled on and sheer and utter joy! It is always the best week of my year. I like to complain about it but that is part of the allure. Kind of like being female, you know they’re not happy unless they are complaining. (That is the sarcasm that often gets me in trouble.) But I enjoy complaining about having to go to the beach and I enjoy complaining after I come back, but secretly this is the week and the family that I always dreamed of.
Now don’t get me wrong about my side of the family, we just have a different way of showing our love. We must live several hours from each other where the in-laws all live on the family ponderosa. My family tries to have meals together during special holidays where the in-laws try and eat together as much as they can.
By the end of week, I hope my wife and kids appreciate me half as much as I do them. Often I just sit and stare at them across the room, while they sleep, or as they play. It is hard to ignore the wonderfulness of my wife and kids during the 7 days on the “Ark.” I want my kids to see the joy in being together as a family. And I want them to see that it ain’t always picture perfect. It ain’t always clean, nice, sweet, and even likeable. But it IS about family and about love. Don’t worry about the warts or black sheep in the family, but really focus on the loving glow that engulfs us all.
I think that Proverbs verse says “I’d rather eat salad with my in-laws than steak with the neighbors.” And I wouldn’t trade 1 Brawl at the Beach for 100 Disney Trips.
The sad truth is because of aging kids and more hectic schedules, this may be the last Brawl at the Beach. My hope is that it’s less than 53 weeks before we do it all over again and I am counting the weeks. Just don’t tell my mother in law.
It will not be long before the school bells start ringing again and it signals the end of another hectic summer. The summer of 2009 will be highlighted just like every summer for the past 15 summers; It is the annual Johnson family (my in-laws) beach trip.
Let me describe the week for you. 5 families, 18 people, and 1 house. More numerical trivia defines the week as 1 kitchen, 4 bathrooms, 4 in-laws, and 1 TV. There is another TV in brother in-law Brian’s bedroom but he retires to that room at 6pm every night so that TV was off limits. 10 adults and 8 children, a few of the adults could be classified as children but that is another story. There are 7 females and 11 males. Now refer back to that 1 TV thing and factor in only one remote.
Not that the average temperature on the beach is usually in excess of 100 degrees and that our A/C does all it can to cool the house below 75 has anything to do with it, but the week is always HOT! I used to print family tee shirts called The Brawl at the Beach, but my wife said that slogan painted a bad picture of our family and she wanted something more positive. I liked to call it The Brawl at the Beach because every summer for the last fifteen years this beach trip has been accentuated by an argument between spouses, a parent and child, or siblings. Every year, like clock work, someone was fighting by Wednesday.
You could call my family’s car the Vegas car because the 5 hour drive to the beach is spent speculating and placing odds on whom would be fighting first and what they would be fighting about. Oh yea, did I share that there are four in laws on this trip, and I am one of them? Well I am preparing to spend a week at the beach with the in-laws or better put, as THE IN-LAW. And this week is the best week of the year for me and my wife and kids.
I think what attracted me most to my wife was her family. My family communicates best over the phone and now by email. This family likes to hang out. That is “hang out with each other!” My family struggles to be civil to each other yet this family’s heartbeat is getting on each other’s nerves. It seems that they would rather argue together than be happy alone. I think there is a bible verse that says that in Proverbs! My family last took a beach trip or any vacation for that matter in 1973 and that was a true brawl at the beach.
But anyway this in-law revelry is so appealing to me that I am enthralled by the week like they have me in some brain washed hypnotic state. In a nutshell the beach trip is encompassed by husband-wife spats, bratty kids (except mine), smart-alec comments (that is me), hurt feelings, little relaxation, high stress, last nerves being trampled on and sheer and utter joy! It is always the best week of my year. I like to complain about it but that is part of the allure. Kind of like being female, you know they’re not happy unless they are complaining. (That is the sarcasm that often gets me in trouble.) But I enjoy complaining about having to go to the beach and I enjoy complaining after I come back, but secretly this is the week and the family that I always dreamed of.
Now don’t get me wrong about my side of the family, we just have a different way of showing our love. We must live several hours from each other where the in-laws all live on the family ponderosa. My family tries to have meals together during special holidays where the in-laws try and eat together as much as they can.
By the end of week, I hope my wife and kids appreciate me half as much as I do them. Often I just sit and stare at them across the room, while they sleep, or as they play. It is hard to ignore the wonderfulness of my wife and kids during the 7 days on the “Ark.” I want my kids to see the joy in being together as a family. And I want them to see that it ain’t always picture perfect. It ain’t always clean, nice, sweet, and even likeable. But it IS about family and about love. Don’t worry about the warts or black sheep in the family, but really focus on the loving glow that engulfs us all.
I think that Proverbs verse says “I’d rather eat salad with my in-laws than steak with the neighbors.” And I wouldn’t trade 1 Brawl at the Beach for 100 Disney Trips.
The sad truth is because of aging kids and more hectic schedules, this may be the last Brawl at the Beach. My hope is that it’s less than 53 weeks before we do it all over again and I am counting the weeks. Just don’t tell my mother in law.
July 20, 2009
TENACITY
I am trying to make myself a runner. This big body is hard to move. Oh I can swim, take spin class, and do the elliptical all day and sweat like Mark Sanford at a press conference. But I have a hard time making myself run. On Monday I ran the outside track for 30 minutes. Of course, every 5 minutes I had that little voice going, “Go inside and finish on the elliptical. Your shins hurt, you will pay for this tonight.” But I kept going. Plod Plod Plod. I have done 9 miles a week for the last two weeks - 3 times each week / 3 miles a pop.
Now if I could show the same tenacity with fighting off soft drinks!
I want to lose some weight and run a half marathon, but I am too impatient and will not really work for it. Our world is like that. We want instant gratification. But we all remember our grandmothers saying to us, “Haste makes waste” or “Good things come to those who wait.” One of the major mind sets I hope to teach my children are that any worthwhile accomplishment or acquisition takes time.
Tenacity is that internal doggedness that allows us to hang in there and overcome impatience.
I love setting goals at work and dreaming big. I am a firm believer that if we don’t stretch ourselves there is little reward. Difficult challenging goals create purpose. When we have those stretch goals we can’t get bogged down with obstacles. Road blocks change the course a bit but not the destination. One of my favorite John Wooden quotes is “The journey is better than the destination.”
She thought, “if I could just touch his robe, I will be healed” Matthew 9:21
This story inspires me. After she touched Jesus he stopped and asked, “Who touched me?”
The woman must have thought he was angry because she was unclean. Peter told Jesus to relax that there was a big crowd and someone just bumped him on accident.
“No, someone deliberately touched me, for I felt the power go out from me,” Jesus responded.
When Jesus turned and the crowed backed away the women cowered. She started to explain why she touched him. She must have been so embarrassed. I can imagine she was internally scolding herself about taking such a risk.
“Daughter,” he said to her, “your faith has made you well. Go in peace.” (Luke 8:47-48)
Pray today for the tenacity to overcome obstacles and negative people. Draw back on experiences when you persevered. Commit yourself to be focused on the main objective of excellence and avoid anything that detracts you or takes you off course. Ask for the tenacity to do the things that are important to God.
Now if I could show the same tenacity with fighting off soft drinks!
I want to lose some weight and run a half marathon, but I am too impatient and will not really work for it. Our world is like that. We want instant gratification. But we all remember our grandmothers saying to us, “Haste makes waste” or “Good things come to those who wait.” One of the major mind sets I hope to teach my children are that any worthwhile accomplishment or acquisition takes time.
Tenacity is that internal doggedness that allows us to hang in there and overcome impatience.
I love setting goals at work and dreaming big. I am a firm believer that if we don’t stretch ourselves there is little reward. Difficult challenging goals create purpose. When we have those stretch goals we can’t get bogged down with obstacles. Road blocks change the course a bit but not the destination. One of my favorite John Wooden quotes is “The journey is better than the destination.”
She thought, “if I could just touch his robe, I will be healed” Matthew 9:21
This story inspires me. After she touched Jesus he stopped and asked, “Who touched me?”
The woman must have thought he was angry because she was unclean. Peter told Jesus to relax that there was a big crowd and someone just bumped him on accident.
“No, someone deliberately touched me, for I felt the power go out from me,” Jesus responded.
When Jesus turned and the crowed backed away the women cowered. She started to explain why she touched him. She must have been so embarrassed. I can imagine she was internally scolding herself about taking such a risk.
“Daughter,” he said to her, “your faith has made you well. Go in peace.” (Luke 8:47-48)
Pray today for the tenacity to overcome obstacles and negative people. Draw back on experiences when you persevered. Commit yourself to be focused on the main objective of excellence and avoid anything that detracts you or takes you off course. Ask for the tenacity to do the things that are important to God.
July 8, 2009
INITIATIVE
I think people today are lacking entrepreneurship. Somewhere along the way we lost some moxie, some mojo, the old intestinal fortitude. I have heard the leadership axiom a million times, “Ask for forgiveness, not permission.”
Come on folks, let’s try something new!
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. It makes me want to scream, “Do something different!!!”
If we allow the fear of failure to keep us from acting, we can never reach our full potential. Nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes, but learning from failure is so valuable. (Read John Maxwell’s Failing Forward.) In athletics, I hate when the team with the lead backs off the game plan that is working to stall or try and preserve a lead. They worry about making a mistake. And what do they do? THEY MAKE A MISTAKE!!!! Hello defensive coordinators….no prevent defense! Keep blitzing!
I think the fear of failure or rejection is normal but it shouldn’t paralyze us. I know it hurts when the girl says "NO" to going out with you (I know it all too well) but that ain’t too bad. Life goes on! I know it stings when a donor doesn’t make a gift at the level we have planned, but the world keeps spinning. That is not as bad as living with the unanswered question of would she? Or would he?
Ask God for boldness so you can stretch the limitations of your life. This will help you reach your God given potential. Ask for help in overcoming the fears in your life and to be more Christ-like. Make decisions that will represent you and Christ!
Come on folks, let’s try something new!
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. It makes me want to scream, “Do something different!!!”
If we allow the fear of failure to keep us from acting, we can never reach our full potential. Nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes, but learning from failure is so valuable. (Read John Maxwell’s Failing Forward.) In athletics, I hate when the team with the lead backs off the game plan that is working to stall or try and preserve a lead. They worry about making a mistake. And what do they do? THEY MAKE A MISTAKE!!!! Hello defensive coordinators….no prevent defense! Keep blitzing!
I think the fear of failure or rejection is normal but it shouldn’t paralyze us. I know it hurts when the girl says "NO" to going out with you (I know it all too well) but that ain’t too bad. Life goes on! I know it stings when a donor doesn’t make a gift at the level we have planned, but the world keeps spinning. That is not as bad as living with the unanswered question of would she? Or would he?
Ask God for boldness so you can stretch the limitations of your life. This will help you reach your God given potential. Ask for help in overcoming the fears in your life and to be more Christ-like. Make decisions that will represent you and Christ!
July 1, 2009
Top 10 Signs Your Kid is Having a Bad Time at Summer Camp
10. Daily art brought home signed "Prisoner #325"
9. Sounds disappointed when he mentions not being able to use his “epi pen.”
8. He's asking you to sprinkle Prozac on his yogurt
7. When you pick him up, he proudly shows off his black eye
6. Camp director phones and says, "We're concerned about Psycho, I mean your son"
5. "Craft time" is 14 hours of cleaning the grout in the locker rooms
4. His name: "Jimmy"; his nickname: "What’s his name?"
3. Practices his new second language at dinner which is a string of four letter expletives
2. You ask to see the picture of his friends -- he shows you a photo of a stick
and the number 1 sign that your kid is having a bad time at summer camp.....
1. His favorite counselor is the crazy homeless man on the soccer fields
9. Sounds disappointed when he mentions not being able to use his “epi pen.”
8. He's asking you to sprinkle Prozac on his yogurt
7. When you pick him up, he proudly shows off his black eye
6. Camp director phones and says, "We're concerned about Psycho, I mean your son"
5. "Craft time" is 14 hours of cleaning the grout in the locker rooms
4. His name: "Jimmy"; his nickname: "What’s his name?"
3. Practices his new second language at dinner which is a string of four letter expletives
2. You ask to see the picture of his friends -- he shows you a photo of a stick
and the number 1 sign that your kid is having a bad time at summer camp.....
1. His favorite counselor is the crazy homeless man on the soccer fields
June 29, 2009
LISTEN FIRST
Don’t you hate when you will speak to someone and then after a few minutes they say, “Were you talking to me?” I know my wife hates when I do that! And it is funny how multiple eye witnesses can come up with the totally different reports on hair color, or make of car or clothing. Often times I may be introduced to someone and 5 seconds later I have forgotten their name!
At the Y, we have worked on a program called “Listen First” and that has helped me immensely. Not planning what I am going to say as response, but genuinely listening through the entire conversation. Often times when I am at my best I can pick up on a little thing that makes a huge impact. I learn about birthdays, anniversaries, who is sick, who they know, who they are related too and or who is …….just fill in the blank.
The other important aspect of paying better attention is that we learn when we listen. If we remain attentive, not only can we improve ourselves, but we can also avoid making the same mistakes as others.
I find that when I ask questions it keeps me focused on who I am with and paying better attention. My daughter was very inquisitive as a child and seemed to always be trying to figure something out. She is so smart today and I think her ability to pay attention is the reason that her school work comes so easy.
So let’s not sleepwalk through life like those others. Let’s keep our eyes open and be smart. 1 Thessalonians 5:6
I wonder how many times I have forgotten my listen first skills when interacting with God. I often ask for burning bushes or grandiose signs from God, but am I really paying attention to God’s voice?
God wants us paying attention so we can not only hear him but recognize the devil! I always understand when the devil speaks to me…..but it is usually after the fact. I am not paying attention. God’s call is all around us and often it is in the small and obvious things around me. When I am at my best is when I am in an operating mode that allows me to listen. Listen to God in what I see, who I speak with, what I read and what is on my heart. These are the times when I realize that God is leading me.
Take time in your prayer life to ask God to forgive the cycles of A.D.D. in your faith life. Ask for your attention to his promptings. Make sure you are on guard for the voices that pull you away from God.
“I am but a small pencil in the hand of God writing a love letter to the world.” Mother Teresa
At the Y, we have worked on a program called “Listen First” and that has helped me immensely. Not planning what I am going to say as response, but genuinely listening through the entire conversation. Often times when I am at my best I can pick up on a little thing that makes a huge impact. I learn about birthdays, anniversaries, who is sick, who they know, who they are related too and or who is …….just fill in the blank.
The other important aspect of paying better attention is that we learn when we listen. If we remain attentive, not only can we improve ourselves, but we can also avoid making the same mistakes as others.
I find that when I ask questions it keeps me focused on who I am with and paying better attention. My daughter was very inquisitive as a child and seemed to always be trying to figure something out. She is so smart today and I think her ability to pay attention is the reason that her school work comes so easy.
So let’s not sleepwalk through life like those others. Let’s keep our eyes open and be smart. 1 Thessalonians 5:6
I wonder how many times I have forgotten my listen first skills when interacting with God. I often ask for burning bushes or grandiose signs from God, but am I really paying attention to God’s voice?
God wants us paying attention so we can not only hear him but recognize the devil! I always understand when the devil speaks to me…..but it is usually after the fact. I am not paying attention. God’s call is all around us and often it is in the small and obvious things around me. When I am at my best is when I am in an operating mode that allows me to listen. Listen to God in what I see, who I speak with, what I read and what is on my heart. These are the times when I realize that God is leading me.
Take time in your prayer life to ask God to forgive the cycles of A.D.D. in your faith life. Ask for your attention to his promptings. Make sure you are on guard for the voices that pull you away from God.
“I am but a small pencil in the hand of God writing a love letter to the world.” Mother Teresa
June 17, 2009
SELF – CONTROL
One of my friends was describing driving by an intersection and watching two people standing beside their cars just pummeling each other. What would have to happen for you to get that angry? When our emotions take over, the execution of our actions is at peril. When emotions dominate our actions, we make mistakes.
I have done this experiment many times. When I have a smooth and steady golf swing I tend to hit the ball straighter and almost as far as when I swing hard. When I swing hard there is a higher chance that the ball is going to go further left or right and not straight. One of the greatest lessons that golf teaches us is that when we make a mistake, we can’t double up our efforts and hit it twice as hard and make up for the error. The best course of action is to just step back and make the best of your situation, minimize the damage. Try reminding me of this the next time I am 200 yards away from the green and have to carry the water.
Knowing God leads to self-control. Self-control leads to patient endurance and patient endurance leads to godliness. (2 Peter 5:6)
In the bible, Joseph exhibits tremendous self control. He didn’t let sexual inducement from the Potifar’s wife over come him and he didn’t throw a fit at God when he lost everything and landed in jail.
Our job is to be like Joseph and be a mirror that reflects God’s glory. The problem is that often our pride, our temper, the quick fuse, our emotions, our biting sarcasm (just keep the list going) clouds our mirror.
We have to ask ourselves, “what areas of our lives present the greatest difficulty in gaining and maintaining self-control?” We must commit ourselves to a closer relationship with God so that we can live a more balance life with greater self control and sound judgment.
Be a reflection that glorifies God. Ask for God to help you overcome the temptations that restrict your ability to be in control. Tee it up, take a deep breath and slow and steady!
I have done this experiment many times. When I have a smooth and steady golf swing I tend to hit the ball straighter and almost as far as when I swing hard. When I swing hard there is a higher chance that the ball is going to go further left or right and not straight. One of the greatest lessons that golf teaches us is that when we make a mistake, we can’t double up our efforts and hit it twice as hard and make up for the error. The best course of action is to just step back and make the best of your situation, minimize the damage. Try reminding me of this the next time I am 200 yards away from the green and have to carry the water.
Knowing God leads to self-control. Self-control leads to patient endurance and patient endurance leads to godliness. (2 Peter 5:6)
In the bible, Joseph exhibits tremendous self control. He didn’t let sexual inducement from the Potifar’s wife over come him and he didn’t throw a fit at God when he lost everything and landed in jail.
Our job is to be like Joseph and be a mirror that reflects God’s glory. The problem is that often our pride, our temper, the quick fuse, our emotions, our biting sarcasm (just keep the list going) clouds our mirror.
We have to ask ourselves, “what areas of our lives present the greatest difficulty in gaining and maintaining self-control?” We must commit ourselves to a closer relationship with God so that we can live a more balance life with greater self control and sound judgment.
Be a reflection that glorifies God. Ask for God to help you overcome the temptations that restrict your ability to be in control. Tee it up, take a deep breath and slow and steady!
June 10, 2009
Quick Observations
While working out tonight, I was listening to my ipod and watching TV. Mulit-tasking and multi-inspired I had two thoughts that I want to share.
First - The scene where Jamie Lee Curtis dances for "Ahnold" in the movie True Lies is one of the great scenes in movie history.
* How does she do Activa commercials today?
Second - The songwriter for Taylor Swift is pretty good. I have been trying for weeks to change the lyrics on the Tim McGraw song to "When you hear the Commodores" but I am having a hard time making it fit!
First - The scene where Jamie Lee Curtis dances for "Ahnold" in the movie True Lies is one of the great scenes in movie history.
* How does she do Activa commercials today?
Second - The songwriter for Taylor Swift is pretty good. I have been trying for weeks to change the lyrics on the Tim McGraw song to "When you hear the Commodores" but I am having a hard time making it fit!
June 2, 2009
LOYALTY
I love some pretty crazy sports teams. I am embarrassed to say that I love the Detroit Lions, maybe the worst team in the NFL the last 20 years. I also love the Washington Nationals, Baltimore Orioles, the Utah Jazz, all things Notre Dame and UNC Tar Heels. If it weren’t for my beloved Tar Heels my sports life would be close to miserable.
The fact that I love the Washington Nationals is funny to me. A few years back they were the Montreal Expos and that was the team I really loved. When Montreal lost its franchise I was heartbroken and I pledged to hate the Washington Nationals. But guess what happened the next spring training? Those players from the year before were still my favorite and I found myself watching box scores and pulling for them even though that was an exercise in futility.
I was still loyal to those players. However loyalty is more than just identification to those players, but the depth of the word comes into play when we add concepts such as devotion, duty, faithfulness, and commitment. It’s interesting that these virtues can be given to teams, people, organizations, governments, countries religions and God.
Loyalty is one of those foundational virtues that gets us through hard times. We can become great in the eyes of others, but we struggle finding success when we compromise our character and show disloyalty toward our peers and friends. At work, people have to know that they can count on you. When we know that there will be support in tight spots, we are more likely to go the extra mile. That combination makes for a cohesive unit or team.
So then, brethren, stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught, whether by word of mouth or by letter from us – 2 Thessalonians 2:15
I struggle with a younger generation that changes jobs frequently. I guess I am old school in that I believe in this reciprocal loyalty between employee and employer. It is too easy to leave a job, too easy to get divorced, too easy to ignore our kids attitudes, too easy to ignore our faith. God definitely wants old school loyalty of us. He thinks it’s cool to be old school.
Loyalty can be risky and hurt if it’s not reciprocated, but I would rather be on that side of the bruised ego or heart. Commit yourself through prayer and actions to be loyal to your family, to your peers, to your friends, your spouse and to those you have given your word. Offer God your devotion and loyalty. Carry out the responsibilities that he lays on your heart. Take strength in foundational loyalty and stand firm!
The fact that I love the Washington Nationals is funny to me. A few years back they were the Montreal Expos and that was the team I really loved. When Montreal lost its franchise I was heartbroken and I pledged to hate the Washington Nationals. But guess what happened the next spring training? Those players from the year before were still my favorite and I found myself watching box scores and pulling for them even though that was an exercise in futility.
I was still loyal to those players. However loyalty is more than just identification to those players, but the depth of the word comes into play when we add concepts such as devotion, duty, faithfulness, and commitment. It’s interesting that these virtues can be given to teams, people, organizations, governments, countries religions and God.
Loyalty is one of those foundational virtues that gets us through hard times. We can become great in the eyes of others, but we struggle finding success when we compromise our character and show disloyalty toward our peers and friends. At work, people have to know that they can count on you. When we know that there will be support in tight spots, we are more likely to go the extra mile. That combination makes for a cohesive unit or team.
So then, brethren, stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught, whether by word of mouth or by letter from us – 2 Thessalonians 2:15
I struggle with a younger generation that changes jobs frequently. I guess I am old school in that I believe in this reciprocal loyalty between employee and employer. It is too easy to leave a job, too easy to get divorced, too easy to ignore our kids attitudes, too easy to ignore our faith. God definitely wants old school loyalty of us. He thinks it’s cool to be old school.
Loyalty can be risky and hurt if it’s not reciprocated, but I would rather be on that side of the bruised ego or heart. Commit yourself through prayer and actions to be loyal to your family, to your peers, to your friends, your spouse and to those you have given your word. Offer God your devotion and loyalty. Carry out the responsibilities that he lays on your heart. Take strength in foundational loyalty and stand firm!
May 25, 2009
COOPERATION
John Wooden says, “With all levels of your co-workers – listen if you want to be heard and be interested in finding the best way, not in having your own way.”
Some people just like to work alone. I know there are many jobs out there that require such isolation: writers, scientists, painters, etc. But for me, I love the dynamic of a group or a team. Working with others helps me reach my potential much more than I can do alone.
I love the story of the young farmer who was working a team of mules, attempting to pull a load up a steep road. The young farmer was loud and abusive. Constantly screaming, slapping and barking demands at the mules. The results were hyper and agitated mules who were working against each other. With a gentle voice and a gentler touch the old farmer stepped forward, calmed the mules and walked them forward. The mules cooperated and could do much more as a team.
The two lessons are a 1) Gentleness is a better method of getting cooperation than harshness is (I still haven’t mastered this) 2) A team can accomplish much more together than an individual can do alone.
That is why I love collaborations and partnerships. I love when synergy is created and resources are maximized. I love when a group of people work together and do an awesome job on a project.
Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one; they get a better return for their labor – Ecclesiastes 4:9
Paul writes about the use of our spiritual gifts and notes more than 20 spiritual gifts in the scriptures. Every believer is given at least one spiritual gift and probably more. Problems arise on our teams when we do not use our spiritual gifts. The team suffers and we are not as effective. It is up to our peers to keep us accountable to the team. To ensure that we are woven tightly into the success goals of the group and that we are optimizing our gifts for the team.
Everyone has an innate desire to be in a relationship and to be in a group. Be willing to cooperate with each other for the good of the team. Maximize your personal potential by utilizing your spiritual gifts for the good of the team and the glory of God.
Some people just like to work alone. I know there are many jobs out there that require such isolation: writers, scientists, painters, etc. But for me, I love the dynamic of a group or a team. Working with others helps me reach my potential much more than I can do alone.
I love the story of the young farmer who was working a team of mules, attempting to pull a load up a steep road. The young farmer was loud and abusive. Constantly screaming, slapping and barking demands at the mules. The results were hyper and agitated mules who were working against each other. With a gentle voice and a gentler touch the old farmer stepped forward, calmed the mules and walked them forward. The mules cooperated and could do much more as a team.
The two lessons are a 1) Gentleness is a better method of getting cooperation than harshness is (I still haven’t mastered this) 2) A team can accomplish much more together than an individual can do alone.
That is why I love collaborations and partnerships. I love when synergy is created and resources are maximized. I love when a group of people work together and do an awesome job on a project.
Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one; they get a better return for their labor – Ecclesiastes 4:9
Paul writes about the use of our spiritual gifts and notes more than 20 spiritual gifts in the scriptures. Every believer is given at least one spiritual gift and probably more. Problems arise on our teams when we do not use our spiritual gifts. The team suffers and we are not as effective. It is up to our peers to keep us accountable to the team. To ensure that we are woven tightly into the success goals of the group and that we are optimizing our gifts for the team.
Everyone has an innate desire to be in a relationship and to be in a group. Be willing to cooperate with each other for the good of the team. Maximize your personal potential by utilizing your spiritual gifts for the good of the team and the glory of God.
May 13, 2009
Friendships
When I ask staff what they love best about their job they say it’s the people. That is 100% of the time. There is not much hesitation either. The relationships we form working side by side with people for 40, 50, 60 hours per week makes a tremendous impact on us. In most cases, we actually spend more time with our friends at work than we do our family. My friends in other spheres of my life think I am strange when I say that my BEST friends in the world are the people at work.
God did not design us to go through life alone. The moment that we understand our success in the context that we will become so much more alongside others is a critical “A HA” moment. Friends are part of our success and just as equally important, we impact their success. Friendship goes both ways. Great "FRIEND" synergy is when all the “doing” goes in both directions.
Friendship is why I love Facebook. Friendship is why I love the AYP conference and other Y meetings. Friendship is why I send emails, make phone calls and write letters. Granted, it is hard to have a deep friendship with people at such a distance and with so little contact, but it is the cultivation of that relationship that is important to me. I understand that friendships complete us. We will all be better for having taken friends on our journey.
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
Spend some time thanking God for friends. Be thankful for that friend that keeps you accountable to your faith. Make sure you hold your friends accountable to a high standard. Work hard on your friendships to ensure that they are not just a one-way relationship. Pray hard that your relationships will be as strong as a triple braided cord.
God did not design us to go through life alone. The moment that we understand our success in the context that we will become so much more alongside others is a critical “A HA” moment. Friends are part of our success and just as equally important, we impact their success. Friendship goes both ways. Great "FRIEND" synergy is when all the “doing” goes in both directions.
Friendship is why I love Facebook. Friendship is why I love the AYP conference and other Y meetings. Friendship is why I send emails, make phone calls and write letters. Granted, it is hard to have a deep friendship with people at such a distance and with so little contact, but it is the cultivation of that relationship that is important to me. I understand that friendships complete us. We will all be better for having taken friends on our journey.
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
Spend some time thanking God for friends. Be thankful for that friend that keeps you accountable to your faith. Make sure you hold your friends accountable to a high standard. Work hard on your friendships to ensure that they are not just a one-way relationship. Pray hard that your relationships will be as strong as a triple braided cord.
May 7, 2009
Enthusiasm
I cringe when I hear people talk about hating their job. These people get out of bed saying, “Good Lord it’s morning” versus “Good morning Lord.” That puts them at a distinct disadvantage, because I truly believe that you have to enjoy what you do in order to succeed.
I know there always days where you are less productive than other days. If you are like me you have to force yourself on some level to accomplish your daily goals. I can’t imagine every day being like that. Because for most days I am enthusiastic about coming to work and I strive to be better today than yesterday.
When I look back over my career I find that things that excite me the most are challenges. I can empathize with those who mope around and wonder why only bad things happen to them, but I love challenges. When we have been short staffed, incurred financial challenges, relationship problems and leadership dilemmas…I just enjoy taking them “head-on!”
When my brother died I guess I moped around for about two weeks when finally I just had to make myself snap out of it. I can remember thinking to myself how I was letting people down. My family, my staff and my Y needed me to lead and I had to get with the program. The end result was basically I was the only one that I had to find the enthusiasm again!!!
Enthusiasm stimulates the people around you. Extreme highs do not work but consistent and sincere enjoyment of your work motivates your peers and your employees. It exudes confidence and rubs off in miraculous ways.
Never be lazy in your work, but serve the Lord enthusiastically (Romans 12:11)
Back in the early stages of the Y, we had two college kids that worked afternoons at the Y with our sports programs. They would roll into the Y around 2pm all full of teenage life and fun and try and mesh their energy and enthusiasm with what would sometimes be stress and anxiety. At first it was a clash, but after awhile, our office conformed to their positive energy and we looked forward to their enthusiasm.
Let us all serve God by loving our job and working with enthusiasm. Let that passion rub off on all that come in contact with us. Become all that you can be and all that GOD intended you to be by waking up saying “GOOD MORNING LORD.”
I know there always days where you are less productive than other days. If you are like me you have to force yourself on some level to accomplish your daily goals. I can’t imagine every day being like that. Because for most days I am enthusiastic about coming to work and I strive to be better today than yesterday.
When I look back over my career I find that things that excite me the most are challenges. I can empathize with those who mope around and wonder why only bad things happen to them, but I love challenges. When we have been short staffed, incurred financial challenges, relationship problems and leadership dilemmas…I just enjoy taking them “head-on!”
When my brother died I guess I moped around for about two weeks when finally I just had to make myself snap out of it. I can remember thinking to myself how I was letting people down. My family, my staff and my Y needed me to lead and I had to get with the program. The end result was basically I was the only one that I had to find the enthusiasm again!!!
Enthusiasm stimulates the people around you. Extreme highs do not work but consistent and sincere enjoyment of your work motivates your peers and your employees. It exudes confidence and rubs off in miraculous ways.
Never be lazy in your work, but serve the Lord enthusiastically (Romans 12:11)
Back in the early stages of the Y, we had two college kids that worked afternoons at the Y with our sports programs. They would roll into the Y around 2pm all full of teenage life and fun and try and mesh their energy and enthusiasm with what would sometimes be stress and anxiety. At first it was a clash, but after awhile, our office conformed to their positive energy and we looked forward to their enthusiasm.
Let us all serve God by loving our job and working with enthusiasm. Let that passion rub off on all that come in contact with us. Become all that you can be and all that GOD intended you to be by waking up saying “GOOD MORNING LORD.”
April 29, 2009
PLANNING
I read the other day that if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your future plans. I can just see him laughing at me and saying, “Sure you are…..no Cam, I know the plans I have for you.”
It is funny how some of my most productive days happen when I just clear my desk and plan. I spend time re-prioritizing and outlining the next day or the next week or the next month. That kind of organization is cleansing in some respect.
For the Y, we have had almost 17 years of what I would say has been successful. Not always have we been successful because of a carefully calculated plan. In fact I would say mostly we have been successful just because we have been good. In a sense we have often had good people, working hard and serving a mission that the community has embraced. Some may call that lucky or timely, but I just call it being good. In Jim Collins book, Good to Great, he discusses the fly wheel approach and how the momentum of success creates more success. I think that exemplifies the Y.
In saying all of that, I am sure that when we have been most organized, most efficient and most impactful, it has been the direct result of a carefully orchestrated plan. Not just creating a plan, but efficiently executing the plan. I am sure Louisville’s women’s basketball team had a great game plan to beat the Connecticut team, but executing is an entirely different deal.
This has taught me that if we are to become all that we are capable of being organizationally, it is important that we be good and work hard; but we also must realize that we be intentional about how we plan and execute the plan. Planning places effort where effort is most needed. Organizations that put hard work, planning and execution together have a firm foundation to execute their mission.
Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty. – Proverbs 21:5
Great organizations, great teams, and great employees stay committed to establishing and maintaining times for reflection. We must listen to God so that we can discern HIS plans. Our mission has to be at the forefront. The synergy of combing our hard work, our god given talents with careful planning not only furthers our mission but HIS Mission.
It is funny how some of my most productive days happen when I just clear my desk and plan. I spend time re-prioritizing and outlining the next day or the next week or the next month. That kind of organization is cleansing in some respect.
For the Y, we have had almost 17 years of what I would say has been successful. Not always have we been successful because of a carefully calculated plan. In fact I would say mostly we have been successful just because we have been good. In a sense we have often had good people, working hard and serving a mission that the community has embraced. Some may call that lucky or timely, but I just call it being good. In Jim Collins book, Good to Great, he discusses the fly wheel approach and how the momentum of success creates more success. I think that exemplifies the Y.
In saying all of that, I am sure that when we have been most organized, most efficient and most impactful, it has been the direct result of a carefully orchestrated plan. Not just creating a plan, but efficiently executing the plan. I am sure Louisville’s women’s basketball team had a great game plan to beat the Connecticut team, but executing is an entirely different deal.
This has taught me that if we are to become all that we are capable of being organizationally, it is important that we be good and work hard; but we also must realize that we be intentional about how we plan and execute the plan. Planning places effort where effort is most needed. Organizations that put hard work, planning and execution together have a firm foundation to execute their mission.
Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty. – Proverbs 21:5
Great organizations, great teams, and great employees stay committed to establishing and maintaining times for reflection. We must listen to God so that we can discern HIS plans. Our mission has to be at the forefront. The synergy of combing our hard work, our god given talents with careful planning not only furthers our mission but HIS Mission.
April 16, 2009
Hard Work
One funny thing that came out in the staff satisfaction survey is that staff watches each other work. Staff looks at when they come to work, when they leave and what they do while they are here. It is a constant measurement about “are they working as hard as I am?”
Hard work is a funny thing. You always hear the good salesman talk about how he doesn’t work hard but he works smart. Just recently we witnessed Tyler Hansbrough being honored for working so hard. Half the people loved what he stood for and others detested him for being overrated. Are the detractors just jealous and lazy? I think it is funny that the hard worker is the unusual and not the norm.
There is no substitute for hard work. Most people have a tendency to look for shortcuts or at least for the easiest way to complete a task. If we only put out a minimum effort we might get by in some situations, but in the long run we won’t fully develop the talents that lie within us.
Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty. – Proverbs 21:5
I love those days when at the end of the day I am tired. But I can reflect back and see that I not only worked smart, but I worked hard. And all that I accomplished led me to be thankful. I am thankful that I used myself to the BEST of my abilities as God intended.
Our jobs and our lives are not about working just harder than the people beside us. Or measuring them and working only as hard as our peers. I hope that our daily work is about honoring God by committing ourselves to hard work so that we can become all that God created us to be.
Try and view the effort you give as a God’s gift to you. Learn that you are working to honor God and not measure up to the people around us. Honor God’s plans for us by working to the BEST of your abilities.
Hard work is a funny thing. You always hear the good salesman talk about how he doesn’t work hard but he works smart. Just recently we witnessed Tyler Hansbrough being honored for working so hard. Half the people loved what he stood for and others detested him for being overrated. Are the detractors just jealous and lazy? I think it is funny that the hard worker is the unusual and not the norm.
There is no substitute for hard work. Most people have a tendency to look for shortcuts or at least for the easiest way to complete a task. If we only put out a minimum effort we might get by in some situations, but in the long run we won’t fully develop the talents that lie within us.
Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity, but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty. – Proverbs 21:5
I love those days when at the end of the day I am tired. But I can reflect back and see that I not only worked smart, but I worked hard. And all that I accomplished led me to be thankful. I am thankful that I used myself to the BEST of my abilities as God intended.
Our jobs and our lives are not about working just harder than the people beside us. Or measuring them and working only as hard as our peers. I hope that our daily work is about honoring God by committing ourselves to hard work so that we can become all that God created us to be.
Try and view the effort you give as a God’s gift to you. Learn that you are working to honor God and not measure up to the people around us. Honor God’s plans for us by working to the BEST of your abilities.
March 25, 2009
Happy Birthday April
Dear April,
I hope today is a great day for you. I am sorry that I am out of town. But you know that after 20 years of marriage even when I am gone you are never far from my heart.
I have to thank one of my old high school buddies for connecting me with this song. Wanted to save it until our anniversary in December but just can't wait. The words are so perfect. Just click on the Happy Birthday link below and watch my Youtube birthday present.
"WITH THE STRENGTH THAT WE SPEND IN THIS LIFE, IN THE HOPE THAT IT GOES ON FOREVER WE BELIEVE AS WE PROMISE TO TRY, THAT OUR LOVE IS ONE LOVE THAT WILL NEVER FADE AWAY."
Happy Birthday
CAM
I hope today is a great day for you. I am sorry that I am out of town. But you know that after 20 years of marriage even when I am gone you are never far from my heart.
I have to thank one of my old high school buddies for connecting me with this song. Wanted to save it until our anniversary in December but just can't wait. The words are so perfect. Just click on the Happy Birthday link below and watch my Youtube birthday present.
"WITH THE STRENGTH THAT WE SPEND IN THIS LIFE, IN THE HOPE THAT IT GOES ON FOREVER WE BELIEVE AS WE PROMISE TO TRY, THAT OUR LOVE IS ONE LOVE THAT WILL NEVER FADE AWAY."
Happy Birthday
CAM
March 10, 2009
Authentic Leadership
I don’t know if I would have said this 25 years ago when my YMCA career started but today I feel that my faith and my leadership are so integrated that they are now hard to separate. Somewhere over the last decade I have felt a sincere calling from God to develop and focus on my leadership. I have had to sit and pray about my spiritual gifts and to ask if leadership is one of them. Some people may doubt leadership as my spiritual gift and in all honesty sometimes I doubt it myself.
Early in my Y career I had a kid in our after school program exclaim, “I am gifted and talented!”
“You are?” I responded.
“Yes, my teacher has me in the gifted and talented class,” he beamed.
Don’t you wish every kid could feel that way? That everybody could feel that way?
One of my Y staff often talks about the inverted triangle and that leadership is not top down but often bottom up. My faith has helped shape my belief that as a leader I cannot be more important than the organization. The people around me need to trust me and my leadership. I have said the word servant more in the last five years than I have said in my life. Being a servant leader is my responsibility and it is my calling. Not that I am great at being a servant all the time, but that is definitely the new goal line. So by being a servant leader I have to focus on empowerment. My daily challenges have changed from tactical stuff like conducting a meeting to more strategic stuff like helping branches stay aligned and focused with our mission. Today I try and focus on empowering staff and volunteers to meet organizational goals. As the CEO my day should fill up with serving the people around me.
Being a leader at the Y has provided so much significance in my life. We recently heard a leadership speaker talk about how we should follow our compass and not our clock. I used to think that it was all about bigger budgets, bigger buildings, bigger donors and bigger dreams when it is really about significance.
Not quite sure when this all happened but today I pray for my leadership. Today I pray for your leadership. My prayer is that we all understand the purpose, the power and the strength of our leadership. It takes commitment to focus inwardly and to gather input so we can become more aware of our gifts and talents. It is funny how today our job searches have become less about skill and more about values. I have found that I am now motivated by other people finding joy, meaning and success in their work and feeling that I have some small part in all of that. I can only be as good a leader as the leaders that work beside me every day. That ONE thing constantly garners more focus.
The most difficult part of leadership is taking these same skills to my house and leading my family the way I lead my organization.
Thank God for prayer.
And thank god for you!
Early in my Y career I had a kid in our after school program exclaim, “I am gifted and talented!”
“You are?” I responded.
“Yes, my teacher has me in the gifted and talented class,” he beamed.
Don’t you wish every kid could feel that way? That everybody could feel that way?
One of my Y staff often talks about the inverted triangle and that leadership is not top down but often bottom up. My faith has helped shape my belief that as a leader I cannot be more important than the organization. The people around me need to trust me and my leadership. I have said the word servant more in the last five years than I have said in my life. Being a servant leader is my responsibility and it is my calling. Not that I am great at being a servant all the time, but that is definitely the new goal line. So by being a servant leader I have to focus on empowerment. My daily challenges have changed from tactical stuff like conducting a meeting to more strategic stuff like helping branches stay aligned and focused with our mission. Today I try and focus on empowering staff and volunteers to meet organizational goals. As the CEO my day should fill up with serving the people around me.
Being a leader at the Y has provided so much significance in my life. We recently heard a leadership speaker talk about how we should follow our compass and not our clock. I used to think that it was all about bigger budgets, bigger buildings, bigger donors and bigger dreams when it is really about significance.
Not quite sure when this all happened but today I pray for my leadership. Today I pray for your leadership. My prayer is that we all understand the purpose, the power and the strength of our leadership. It takes commitment to focus inwardly and to gather input so we can become more aware of our gifts and talents. It is funny how today our job searches have become less about skill and more about values. I have found that I am now motivated by other people finding joy, meaning and success in their work and feeling that I have some small part in all of that. I can only be as good a leader as the leaders that work beside me every day. That ONE thing constantly garners more focus.
The most difficult part of leadership is taking these same skills to my house and leading my family the way I lead my organization.
Thank God for prayer.
And thank god for you!
February 27, 2009
Emmaus
My brother died 6 years ago this week. Below is something I shared with friends.
04/22/03
Dear Friends,
I want to thank you all for your thoughts and prayers for my family and me in the last few months. Carey and I were very close and I finally feel that I am back to work and giving focus to my job. There would be no other way to survive this, without all of you and I thank you.
During this Easter season I have reflected on what is to me one of the most fascinating stories in the Bible, the Walk to Emmaus. This of course is the story of the two men walking on the road to Emmaus, AFTER Jesus has been crucified. Jesus, very inconspicuously appears beside the men and starts asking them about their grief. Of course they do not recognize Jesus at this time. These men are two friends—people who had known Jesus, who had walked with Him, talked with Him, and eaten meals with Him every day for three years. And they didn’t recognize Him even on a long walk down a dusty road.
This story makes me want to ask two questions; Where is Emmaus? And how do you get back home from there?
Where is Emmaus? Oh sure the bible says it is 7 miles outside of Jerusalem. But when you think about it, the Emmaus road is different. Emmaus is not a place on the map or a village; it is more of a mood. It is a place where you go when life has gone sour on you. Emmaus is the road you choose when your life is filled with despair. Emmaus is not 7 miles from Jerusalem; Emmaus is 7 miles from a sense of hopelessness. It is a road where Jesus just appears, often times he appears without us knowing. Have you ever wondered about that? I have. How could that possibly be? The reality is: like the disciples, we are often looking at a man who happened to be traveling along the same road we were. We do not always see Jesus because we do not always expect to see Jesus.
How do you get back to home from Emmaus? How do you get back from Emmaus when life is hopeless? When the Messiah has been crucified and you are in such despair?
How to you get back from Emmaus when you’re in a stairwell in the World Trade Centers, and the building is crumbling to the ground?
How do you get back from Emmaus in those 90 seconds that our Astronauts sat there when they knew that something had gone wrong on the space shuttle Columbia?
How do you get back from Emmaus when you are a soldier in the desert in Iraq?
And how do you get back from Emmaus when you walk in the door and your wife tells you that your brother is dead?
You get back home by experiencing the living Christ. By having your eyes open and seeing Jesus in everything around us. It might not ever be in some great pomp and circumstance, but just in the small things that we take for granted. In the story these guys have already heard about the tomb being empty, but they didn’t have their eyes opened until he broke the bread. I saw Jesus on my difficult road in all of the cards, letters, hugs, meals, emails, prayers, and tears. I saw Jesus in YOU!
When we open our eyes to Jesus’ presence in the world around us, we will come to see His spirit manifesting in our own lives. And thus we can say as the disciples did at the conclusion to the Emmaus story,
“Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road . . .”—Luke 24:32
When you are on that dusty road, that dusty road of hopelessness…. when you are on any road in your life, you will feel the presence of the living God. If you listen carefully you will hear those sandaled feet falling into step with yours. He is on that road with you. All hope is not lost
The Tomb is Empty!
CAMERON CORDER
04/22/03
Dear Friends,
I want to thank you all for your thoughts and prayers for my family and me in the last few months. Carey and I were very close and I finally feel that I am back to work and giving focus to my job. There would be no other way to survive this, without all of you and I thank you.
During this Easter season I have reflected on what is to me one of the most fascinating stories in the Bible, the Walk to Emmaus. This of course is the story of the two men walking on the road to Emmaus, AFTER Jesus has been crucified. Jesus, very inconspicuously appears beside the men and starts asking them about their grief. Of course they do not recognize Jesus at this time. These men are two friends—people who had known Jesus, who had walked with Him, talked with Him, and eaten meals with Him every day for three years. And they didn’t recognize Him even on a long walk down a dusty road.
This story makes me want to ask two questions; Where is Emmaus? And how do you get back home from there?
Where is Emmaus? Oh sure the bible says it is 7 miles outside of Jerusalem. But when you think about it, the Emmaus road is different. Emmaus is not a place on the map or a village; it is more of a mood. It is a place where you go when life has gone sour on you. Emmaus is the road you choose when your life is filled with despair. Emmaus is not 7 miles from Jerusalem; Emmaus is 7 miles from a sense of hopelessness. It is a road where Jesus just appears, often times he appears without us knowing. Have you ever wondered about that? I have. How could that possibly be? The reality is: like the disciples, we are often looking at a man who happened to be traveling along the same road we were. We do not always see Jesus because we do not always expect to see Jesus.
How do you get back to home from Emmaus? How do you get back from Emmaus when life is hopeless? When the Messiah has been crucified and you are in such despair?
How to you get back from Emmaus when you’re in a stairwell in the World Trade Centers, and the building is crumbling to the ground?
How do you get back from Emmaus in those 90 seconds that our Astronauts sat there when they knew that something had gone wrong on the space shuttle Columbia?
How do you get back from Emmaus when you are a soldier in the desert in Iraq?
And how do you get back from Emmaus when you walk in the door and your wife tells you that your brother is dead?
You get back home by experiencing the living Christ. By having your eyes open and seeing Jesus in everything around us. It might not ever be in some great pomp and circumstance, but just in the small things that we take for granted. In the story these guys have already heard about the tomb being empty, but they didn’t have their eyes opened until he broke the bread. I saw Jesus on my difficult road in all of the cards, letters, hugs, meals, emails, prayers, and tears. I saw Jesus in YOU!
When we open our eyes to Jesus’ presence in the world around us, we will come to see His spirit manifesting in our own lives. And thus we can say as the disciples did at the conclusion to the Emmaus story,
“Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road . . .”—Luke 24:32
When you are on that dusty road, that dusty road of hopelessness…. when you are on any road in your life, you will feel the presence of the living God. If you listen carefully you will hear those sandaled feet falling into step with yours. He is on that road with you. All hope is not lost
The Tomb is Empty!
CAMERON CORDER
February 13, 2009
Great Timing
My 11 year old son Brooks has unbelievable comedic timing.
This week, Ryanne had a playoff basketball game against Winston Salem Prep (WSP). On the way to the game, I shared the old joke about the sea captain and his red shirt. Click here to read joke. At dinner prior to the game the coach was sharing that he had done some checking around and he thought we could beat this team.
But as WSP walked on the court it became obvious we were in for a long night. Every girl was over 5'10 and they looked like they could beat UNC. When I glanced at Brooks to get his reaction he said, "Somebody better get coach his brown pants!"
This week, Ryanne had a playoff basketball game against Winston Salem Prep (WSP). On the way to the game, I shared the old joke about the sea captain and his red shirt. Click here to read joke. At dinner prior to the game the coach was sharing that he had done some checking around and he thought we could beat this team.
But as WSP walked on the court it became obvious we were in for a long night. Every girl was over 5'10 and they looked like they could beat UNC. When I glanced at Brooks to get his reaction he said, "Somebody better get coach his brown pants!"
January 31, 2009
5 Great Movie Scenes
My family likes to play the game in the car where we list things. Movie scenes came up recently and here were some of mine.
Everyone remembers the story of one of the first roommates of different color in the NFL. Brian Song is a wonderful movie about Gayle Sayers and Brian Piccolo and how their friendship developed in the face of Brian Piccolo’s cancer fight. And there is not a man in the world that doesn’t get misty when that music plays. I try and leave the room......“I need to go get some duct tape.” There is something powerful about Best Friends.
Most of you know that I love Notre Dame, so I can’t share movies without talking about Rudy. If you have never played team sports then you have really missed out some great learning’s. The movie Rudy teaches us great leadership lessons on how to model teamwork around the office, in the neighborhood, in your church. I love the Servant Leadership quality about laying down your uniform, your position, and your success so your teammate can have the honor. For me it is all about modeling that authentic Christ like relationship to those people around you.
I am a little embarrassed to say this but I loved Forrest Gump. I especially loved the scene where he is talking to Jenny, the girl he has always loved and he tells her about the beauty of the Sunset as he ran through the desert, and the way the reflection of the Rocky Mountains looked on a this lake at sunrise, and the way the stars looked on a clear night when he was in Viet Nam. Jenny looked up at him and says that she wished she would have been with him, and Gump says, “You were.” Have you ever loved someone so much that you took them in your heart everywhere?
Dreamer is a movie about how the re-training of this injured horse brings together a father and his young daughter. The daughter (Dakota Fanning) writes this story for school. The daughter says it’s a stupid story about a stupid king. And Kurt Russell says I like the stupid King and the girl responds I love the Stupid King. Right there in the movie theater I busted out crying and grabbed Ryanne and she about punched me in the nose. Kids are so real. I need to learn to listen to mine more.
And my fifth movie is Freedom Writers. Don't you just love those movies that give you HOPE. When you can take a young person who thinks they have absolutely nothing to live for and just give them hope.
These make me sound like such a putz! Next time I will talk about Cool Hand Luke, The Maginificent Seven and The Bourne Identity.
Everyone remembers the story of one of the first roommates of different color in the NFL. Brian Song is a wonderful movie about Gayle Sayers and Brian Piccolo and how their friendship developed in the face of Brian Piccolo’s cancer fight. And there is not a man in the world that doesn’t get misty when that music plays. I try and leave the room......“I need to go get some duct tape.” There is something powerful about Best Friends.
Most of you know that I love Notre Dame, so I can’t share movies without talking about Rudy. If you have never played team sports then you have really missed out some great learning’s. The movie Rudy teaches us great leadership lessons on how to model teamwork around the office, in the neighborhood, in your church. I love the Servant Leadership quality about laying down your uniform, your position, and your success so your teammate can have the honor. For me it is all about modeling that authentic Christ like relationship to those people around you.
I am a little embarrassed to say this but I loved Forrest Gump. I especially loved the scene where he is talking to Jenny, the girl he has always loved and he tells her about the beauty of the Sunset as he ran through the desert, and the way the reflection of the Rocky Mountains looked on a this lake at sunrise, and the way the stars looked on a clear night when he was in Viet Nam. Jenny looked up at him and says that she wished she would have been with him, and Gump says, “You were.” Have you ever loved someone so much that you took them in your heart everywhere?
Dreamer is a movie about how the re-training of this injured horse brings together a father and his young daughter. The daughter (Dakota Fanning) writes this story for school. The daughter says it’s a stupid story about a stupid king. And Kurt Russell says I like the stupid King and the girl responds I love the Stupid King. Right there in the movie theater I busted out crying and grabbed Ryanne and she about punched me in the nose. Kids are so real. I need to learn to listen to mine more.
And my fifth movie is Freedom Writers. Don't you just love those movies that give you HOPE. When you can take a young person who thinks they have absolutely nothing to live for and just give them hope.
These make me sound like such a putz! Next time I will talk about Cool Hand Luke, The Maginificent Seven and The Bourne Identity.
January 24, 2009
T'Ville Days
This Facebook stuff is crazy. Asking for friends and being asked to be friends. Posting pictures, adding info, and just researching and trying to find people.
I basically have a few groups with which I am connecting and re-connecting. I have my YMCA friends across the country. I have a group of my Shelby friends. I have those old friends from Wingate College days. I have those older friends from my Mauldin High School and Holly Tree neighborhood. I have a few friends from my years living in High Point.
But one of my favorite groups are the Thomasville people on Facebook. I lived in Thomasville from 1st grade through 7th grade. Everytime I watch the movie Sandlot I think of my life in Thomasville. It was a life of great friends. It was nothing for me, David Saintsing, Press Farabow, John Dunning, Ken Dennis and others to ride bikes all over town or play basketball all day at the Y. I can remember the Thomasville fight song but not my own high school fight song.
It was a life of being the bat boy from my brother's baseball team and worshiping Billy Freeman. It was a life of being scared to death of being hit by a pitch by Darwin Parks. It was a life of being thrown off the school bus by Mr Burgess. It was Kern Street school and the Thomasville Bull Pups. It was First Baptist and Craig Greeson daring me to walk to the front of the church with him so we could be baptized by Joe Hester.
Thomasville was Warren King and the good word.
It was also a life of teenage hormones. I didn't speak to my parents for a month when we
moved to Greenville because I was in love with Sharon Mills and moving ruined my life. It was a life of living next to Laurie Bryant and her being one of my best friends until I was 12 and then it was wow Laurie Bryant!! Same thing goes for Susan Thomason, Pam Manning and Chrystal Hubbard. It was having Paula Porterfield (see picture) speak to me and me not being able to concentrate for the rest of the weak. My first real kiss was Barbara Martin who was two years older than me. I think she did it on a dare or she lost a bet.
For me it was one of those moments like when Squints kissed Wendy Peffercorn.
Life was great then and the fact then many of these wonderful people even remember who I am is staggering. For me to remember them is easy. When you are twelve they are your best friends in the entire world. And now at 44 it feels like they are still my best friends.
I basically have a few groups with which I am connecting and re-connecting. I have my YMCA friends across the country. I have a group of my Shelby friends. I have those old friends from Wingate College days. I have those older friends from my Mauldin High School and Holly Tree neighborhood. I have a few friends from my years living in High Point.
But one of my favorite groups are the Thomasville people on Facebook. I lived in Thomasville from 1st grade through 7th grade. Everytime I watch the movie Sandlot I think of my life in Thomasville. It was a life of great friends. It was nothing for me, David Saintsing, Press Farabow, John Dunning, Ken Dennis and others to ride bikes all over town or play basketball all day at the Y. I can remember the Thomasville fight song but not my own high school fight song.
It was a life of being the bat boy from my brother's baseball team and worshiping Billy Freeman. It was a life of being scared to death of being hit by a pitch by Darwin Parks. It was a life of being thrown off the school bus by Mr Burgess. It was Kern Street school and the Thomasville Bull Pups. It was First Baptist and Craig Greeson daring me to walk to the front of the church with him so we could be baptized by Joe Hester.
Thomasville was Warren King and the good word.
It was also a life of teenage hormones. I didn't speak to my parents for a month when we
moved to Greenville because I was in love with Sharon Mills and moving ruined my life. It was a life of living next to Laurie Bryant and her being one of my best friends until I was 12 and then it was wow Laurie Bryant!! Same thing goes for Susan Thomason, Pam Manning and Chrystal Hubbard. It was having Paula Porterfield (see picture) speak to me and me not being able to concentrate for the rest of the weak. My first real kiss was Barbara Martin who was two years older than me. I think she did it on a dare or she lost a bet.For me it was one of those moments like when Squints kissed Wendy Peffercorn.
Life was great then and the fact then many of these wonderful people even remember who I am is staggering. For me to remember them is easy. When you are twelve they are your best friends in the entire world. And now at 44 it feels like they are still my best friends.
January 18, 2009
Random Thoughts
· I miss Paul Newman. Of course I love Butch and Sundance but my favorite movie of his is Cool Hand Luke. The scenes of him forcing down those hard boiled eggs is a riot.
· I am sure some of you were expecting me to talk about the car wash scene!
· I love great love songs and yesterday on the radio I heard one of the best – Back at One by Brian McKnight
One, you’re like a dream come true
Two, just wanna be with you
Three, it’s plain to see that you’re the only one for me
And four, repeat steps one through three
Five, make you fall in love with me
If I ever believe my work is done then I’ll start back at one
· Along with this song, my ipod favorites are Too Hot by Kool and the Gang, Always and Forever by Heat Wave, Just Once by James Ingram, Three Times A Lady by the Commodores
· I am excited about the inauguration. Even though I am a Republican I do appreciate the historical significance of this event. One of my best friends, Annette Toms, will be there and I look forward to reading her text messages and seeing her pictures!
· The Y was recognized this year by the Minority Business Council as the leading advocate for minority issues this year. I am very proud of this honor because this has been a difficult issue to tackle.
· Did you read the link I posted on my last blog? We are doing that same thing for the players at Crossnore School on Tuesday. I will let you know how it works.
· The Panthers killed me last weekend. As much as I appreciate the toughness of Jake Delhomme, I wanted to reach through the TV and strangle him.
· On Wednesday, I spun on the bike for an hour and then played two hours of full court hoops with the young guys. I couldn’t walk until Saturday. I am getting old.
· Check out my new hobby
· I am sure some of you were expecting me to talk about the car wash scene!
· I love great love songs and yesterday on the radio I heard one of the best – Back at One by Brian McKnight
One, you’re like a dream come true
Two, just wanna be with you
Three, it’s plain to see that you’re the only one for me
And four, repeat steps one through three
Five, make you fall in love with me
If I ever believe my work is done then I’ll start back at one
· Along with this song, my ipod favorites are Too Hot by Kool and the Gang, Always and Forever by Heat Wave, Just Once by James Ingram, Three Times A Lady by the Commodores
· I am excited about the inauguration. Even though I am a Republican I do appreciate the historical significance of this event. One of my best friends, Annette Toms, will be there and I look forward to reading her text messages and seeing her pictures!
· The Y was recognized this year by the Minority Business Council as the leading advocate for minority issues this year. I am very proud of this honor because this has been a difficult issue to tackle.
· Did you read the link I posted on my last blog? We are doing that same thing for the players at Crossnore School on Tuesday. I will let you know how it works.
· The Panthers killed me last weekend. As much as I appreciate the toughness of Jake Delhomme, I wanted to reach through the TV and strangle him.
· On Wednesday, I spun on the bike for an hour and then played two hours of full court hoops with the young guys. I couldn’t walk until Saturday. I am getting old.
· Check out my new hobby
January 2, 2009
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